My Blog
Dogs' pet peeves about humans
‘1’ Blaming your farts on me….. not funny… not funny at all !!!
‘2’ Yelling at me for barking. I’M A FRIGGIN’ DOG
‘3’ Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
‘4’ Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose. Stop it!
‘5’ Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you’re not home.
‘6’ The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
‘7’ Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!
‘8’ Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven’t quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
‘9’ Dog sweaters. Hello ??? Haven’t you noticed the fur?
‘10’ How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth. You’re just jealous.
Top 10 Reasons Why Your Life Is Better Than Your Dog’s
- You don’t have to wait for anybody to drop a deuce.
- You can appreciate a quirky screenplay like Juno.
- A black and tan tastes very good.
- Those strange noises called music, which come from big boxes called speakers, are quite entertaining, as is the other flashing light box called the television.
- You don’t have to walk everywhere on four paws… you can actually drive.
- If you’re a guy, a trip to the haircut place will cost you less than your dog’s grooming appointment.
- You don’t have to eat peanut butter from a Kong.
- The human hierarchy isn’t defined by how many places you can “mark” your territory.
- You don’t have to get “fixed” a la AB 1634.
- Complimentary dog therapy begins the moment you step foot into your home.
You know you're a dog person when...
• You have a kiddie wading pool in the yard, but no small children.
• Lintwheels are on your shopping list every week.
• You have baby gates permanently installed at strategic places around the house, but no babies.
• The trash basket is more or less permanently installed in the kitchen sink, to keep the dog out of it while you’re at work.
• You can’t see out the passenger side of the windshield because there are nose-prints all over the inside.
• Poop has become a source of conversation for you and your significant other.
• You refer to yourselves as Mommy and Daddy.
• You have 32 different names for your dog. Most make no sense, but she understands.
• You have little songs that you sing to your dog, and she always wags when you sing, even though you can’t carry a tune.
• You like people who like your dog. You despise people who don’t.
• You carry dog treats in your purse or pocket at all times.
• You talk about your dog the way other people talk about their kid.
• You sign and send birthday/anniversary/Christmas cards from your dog.
• You put an extra blanket on the sofa so your dog can be comfortable.
• You’d rather stay home on Saturday night and cuddle your dog than go to the movies with your sweetie.
• You go to the pet supply store every Saturday because it’s one of the very few places that lets you bring your dog inside, and your dog loves to go with you.
• You open your purse, and that big bunch of baggies you use for pick-ups pops out.
• You get an extra-long hose on your shower-massage just so you can use it to wash your dog in the tub, without making the dog sit hip-deep in water.
• You don’t think it’s the least bit strange to stand in the back yard chirping "Meg, pee!" over and over again, while Meg tends to play and forget what she’s out there for (but what your neighbors think of your behavior is yet another story).
• You and the dog come down with something like flu on the same day. Your dog sees the vet while you settle for an over-the-counter remedy from the drugstore.
• Your dog is getting old and arthritic, so you go buy lumber and build her a small staircase so she can climb onto the bed by herself.
• Your license plate or license plate frame mentions your dog.
• You match your furniture/carpet/clothes to your dog.
• You have your dog’s picture on your office desk (but no one else’s).
• You lecture people on responsible dog ownership every chance you get.
• You hang around the dog section of your local bookstore.
• You skip breakfast so you can walk your dog in the morning before work.
• You are the only idiot out walking in the pouring rain, but your dog needs her walk.
• You don’t go to happy hours with co-workers any more because you need to go home and see your dog.
• Your parents refer to your pet as their granddog, remember her birthday, and send her greeting cards and gifts.
• Your weekend activities are planned around taking your dog for a hike (both days).
• You keep an extra water dish in your second-floor bedroom, in case your dog gets thirsty at night (after all, her other dish is way down on the first floor…).
• You keep eating even after finding a dog hair in your pasta.
• You carry pictures of your dog in your wallet instead of pictures of your parents, siblings, significant other, or anyone else remotely human.
And the number one reason you know you’re a dog person:
• Your dog is the star of your World Wide Web site!
Best Valentine's Day Gift EVER!
I got a Valentine’s Day gift today from my ex-husband!!!
Now don’t get all excited, we are not getting back together and I have a wonderful long-time partner. But my ex- really gave the gift of love.
No, not to me. To my beloved cat!
Last week I blogged that my cat Jubilee died so suddenly. He left behind my six-year-old cat Rocky who I love dearly, and two antique Cornish Rex boys who sleep 23 hours 45 minutes out of every day. Rocky has been moping around despondently wondering why he doesn’t have any friends left. My ex- and I used to rescue cats and it used to be a crowded household. Now it’s a quiet one (cat-wise at least!)
Rocky and his brother Leamond were thrown from a car on I-95 in rush hour Miami traffic 5-1/2 years ago and my ex rescued them. Their story is a long one and I’ll save it for another day. When I divorced, Rocky stayed with me and Leamond went with the ex.
Let’s just say that we fought over custody of those two kitties very fiercely when we divorced. And there was no way in heck that I thought I would ever see Leamond again.
After Jubilee crossed the Rainbow Bridge last week, I felt so badly for Rocky that I e-mailed my ex, and I pleaded with him to let Leamond come to live with us. My ex has a kitten and three other cats besides Leamond. I told him this is not for me, it is for Rocky.
Well I was so shocked when he agreed!!! I am still in shock!!! He delivered Leamond to my front porch this morning. Wow!!! He has been gone for three years and he is reunited with his brother.
I had to go to work so I’m not sure how they are doing, but I supervised them for an hour before I left and I felt that they would get along just fine without me. My dogs are crated when I am at work, so I knew we wouldn’t have any problems there.
What a happy ending to a sad story. Leamond, the Valentine’s Day Kitty!!!
p.s. Leamond is named after the tow truck driver who helped my ex- rescue the kittens. The rescue is a very long story for another day but let’s just say that Leamond Moorer of Moorer Towing in Miami is one heck of a hero!!!!!
So sad, my cat died
Sweet dreams, Jubilee. I miss you so much.
3-1/2 years ago, one of my employees was rushed to the hospital and Jubilee was left behind in her apartment. Several days later, a co-worker and I got a key to her apartment and rescued him. He’s been with me ever since…a huge, sleek, shiny, glossy black cat with purrsonality plus. EVERYONE loved Jubilee.
I can’t believe it. I will never snuggle my precious boy ever again. This weekend, he seemed to be his normal self…taking his place at the food dishes, coming to my chair begging to be picked up and snuggled, enjoying a brisk brushing, surveying his domain from on top of the walls.
Tuesday morning he picked at his food and walked off. I knew something was up…his fur felt strange but he was not dehydrated. I gave him a few treats which he reluctantly took from me.
Tuesday evening he again only picked…Wednesday morning he would not eat and I called the vet to make an appointment but my favorite vet was booked for days out. I decided to simply be there when they opened this morning, because I know my vet will make time for me. I purchased some chicken baby food and force fed some to Jubes Wednesday night. He politely ate a little but it was bugging him. I didn’t think he was going to die overnight so I didn’t take him to the ER vet. He was losing weight exponentially but I knew he’d make it through the night.
Just as well. When Dr. Tommy picked him up this morning, his face fell. He said this is a very sick cat. He could feel tumours on his kidneys. I left Jubilee to be admitted…hoping he had CRF, Chronic Renal Failure, which can be treated. Dr. Tommy said to come back at 4:30.
But he called me much earlier…said it was bad. Really bad. He had tumours that metastasized throughout his body. Nothing could be done for him. I could come and pick him up and let nature take it’s course.
SCREW THAT! My beautiful sleek man cat was not going to die of starvation. I told the vet that I had to choose euthanasia. I came back at 4 and my darling Jubilee was so weak that they couldn’t find a vein. Finally they did and it took a long time but precious Joobers looked lovingly at me and purred until his lights went out. We said goodbye with love and with dignity.
I am IN SHOCK. This weekend I had no idea that I had a sick cat. I spent a lot of time with each of my animals and usually I can see if one is sick. I don’t know how I didn’t see this coming…but it just came so suddenly.
Jubilee had lung cancer and it spread throughout his body but the tumors that shut his kidneys down were what weakened him at the end. How can a cat get lung cancer? Well, he lived the first 7-ish years of his life in a very tiny apartment with a chain smoker. He was very affectionate with his former owner, like he was with me, so I imagine he was in her lap frequently while she smoked and watched TV.
I’m still in shock. My ancient kitty Digby, near death so many times, 18 years old, skinny, diabetic, with a bad heart, is still hanging in there and still happy with a sense of humor, still affectionate and has a good appetite. His 16 year old life partner, Milosh, is growing more and more tired each day but he’s also in good health. Jubilee was only about 10-1/2 years old. Not a young cat but certainly too young to die.
I’m really sad today. I was totally unprepared for this. When my other kitties passed away, they had been obviously sick for a while and while it was horrid, at least I was prepared. Jubilee’s passing is such a shock. I know this is a dog site but I also know many of you have cats. Please go find all of your cats and give them a big hug from me. 
K-9 Safety Class
Hey South Florida pups, I took this grrrrrreat class Friday night in Hollywood with Tina and Edel. I’ve owned lots of dogs over the years but I learned a lot. Do you know what to do if a dog is approaching you aggressively? Do you know what is the first thing you should do with your dogs the moment you enter the dog park? Is there a safe way to use a flex-leash? How do you break up a fight between your dog and another? It was a great class and it was a blast meeting those two…Tina told me about mydogspace when I registered for the class, this is such a fun place! Woof!
Please help us walk for the animals!
My kids and I are going to walk in the local Humane Society’s Walk For The Animals on March 1. Our goal is modest, just $150, but I’d appreciate donations of any size. I used to volunteer there, and Barkley recently graduated from their Puppy Preschool…it’s a really good place. If you can’t help or don’t care to, please cheer us on as we train for this 1-1/2 mile walk.
Those of you who live in South Florida, would you like to join our team?
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